The Stories...

Being an elementary teacher is a particularly trying experience. It's also particularly rewarding. Over the relatively short period of time that I've spent as a teacher I've cried, laughed and been speechless on so many occasions by the antics that go on in my little world called a classroom. Days later I'll find myself reflecting on a moment with a tear or a smile and telling myself "I really should write this stuff down." As I launch into another year of teaching, I'm sure to add to the collection of stories I already have to record. This profession is a gift. Not everyone can do it and certainly not everyone can enjoy it. But some of us can and some of us do. I can't imagine doing anything else. I'm not the best teacher in the world, I don't have the best ideas or even the most unique. I don't have the fanciest of credentials and I haven't invented anything groundbreaking. But I do have a philosophy about my job and the role it plays in our society and it's on that philosophy that I build each lesson. It's the philosophy that every child has potential and should be approached as if they hold the keys to the success of future generations. I know that not all of them will succeed and most will probably never go beyond ordinary. But do you think when Abraham Lincoln, Nelson Mandela or Barack Obama walked into their first day of grade school that their teacher looked at them and thought, this kid will make history? I doubt they had any idea. But hopefully they looked at them and thought, here is a child, let me strive to empower them to change the world. They did and just maybe it was partly her we can all thank. And so here is my little blog, my ideas, my best and worst moments, my thought process on educating, and how it plays out each day.

Together with my students we have successes and failures. As they say on Law and Order, "These are their stories..."

(all student names have been changed to Jane and Johnny for the privacy and protection of the students and their families)

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

jerm-o-fobeeya

Back to that thing about teaching being a "dirty job."  Why DOESN'T Mike Rowe feature some local elementary school on his show?  I mean really, I don't think people fully appreciate some of the stuff we experience.  

I consider myself pretty tough. I can handle vomit, accidents of any kind, runny noses, boogers and yes the consumption there of. Germs? They've never bothered me. I've never been fanatical about hand washing.  Build up your immune system, that's always been my philosophy.... Of course this year I get Scarlett Fever.  No, contrary to popular belief it was not eradicated with Small Pox and Polio. It's very much alive and a full blown symptom of strep throat.  So I increased my hand washing policy... slightly.  But still, I am an educator. I have an immune system of a bionic person.  I can't be slowed down by a Purell routine.  

But parasites?  Now those get me going.  Any whisper of someone having warts, lice, a lesion of any kind and I'm panicked.  During a previous years a small lice epidemic swept our campus. Just the thought made my head so itchy I was convinced I was infected.  I was constantly running to the mirror to examine my scalp for the source of my psychological itching, convinced I felt critters crawling through my hair.  It finally got so bad I washed with the lice shampoo for a week even though the school nurse kept insisting I was okay.  No doubt did permanent damage to my scalp and hair.  

I thought I knew the major afflictions to look for...lice, ring worm, warts. I'm onto those suckers like white on rice. I feel confident in my ability to spot and prevent the above mentioned so my paranoia is pretty much under control.  

Then comes the Pin Worm.  I get a casual note from a parents saying that over the weekend Sally was diagnosed with Pin Worm.  She's been treated (medication is over the counter so how severe can it be). All good. Back on Monday.  I've never hear of Pin Worm, but since it contains the word "worm" I notify the school nurse.  She brings over some pamphlets to send home on the symptoms and says it's fairly common, just send home the information and let her know if there is anymore cases. Hmmm, I'll just take a peek at that pamphlet so I'm fully educated on the symptoms.  

Key words "highly contagious parasite....inflicts 90% of the population....intestinal....symptoms include...." Oh my god! I'm suddenly itching in places I can't even scratch.  I can FEEL them crawling in my stomach! They're everywhere in my classroom. In everything I've touched.  I glance at my students and suddenly imagine the worst.  Geezus I'm out of Lysol and Purell! IT CAN BE TREATED OVER THE COUNTER! My assistant is as panicked as I am. Together we fuel each others panic attacks. I hit Google like a mad scientist (big mistake). I can't get to a pharmacist fast enough.  I call my husband on the way (he handles it with less grace than I and threatens to ban me from the bed).  

Upon arriving at Walgreens I rush to the pharmacy counter and explain my delima (slightly embarrassed I stress that I'm exposed NOT infected. I'm a teacher I keep saying, as if it makes my predicament noble). He shows me where to find the famed Pin Worm treatment.  I seize a box and turn to go.  

"Uh ma'am." It's the pharmacist. "Might I suggest you wait until you have symptoms before taking the treatment."

"Symptoms?! Symptoms?! Do you know what the symptoms of Pin Worms are?! Wait for symptoms?!  If I had symptoms I'd have checked myself into intensive care good sir! I am a TEACHER and THIS! This is a PREVENTATIVE MEASURE!" 

Pin Worms? Just Google it. Only be prepared to head to Walgreens immediately after. Like I said, it's a dirty job and some of us love to do it.  


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